This is The Beginning of My New Beginning. A pivotal moment in my life that allowed me to start living how I always wanted to do my life. From fun, inspiration, challenge and love. Not because someone else told me how to, what to or when to. It will be part of my book with the working title; M is for Magic. It hasn’t been edited yet, it is pure from my heart to yours. EnJoy.
The Alarm beeped, louuuud. I get pulled out of my dream with a jolt. Why do they make these alarms so harsh! Fuck My Life. Yep that’s sets about the tone of my mornings for the last, eh well, 8 years? Ok maybe there were mornings that I felt slightly brighter, this however was my default.
I sling myself out of bed. I feel chills through my body from my feet hitting the cold floor. I get ready to leave.
How is it, that I still manage to arrive at the office rushed and too late while I live literally around the corner of the office.
I can’t do this anymore, I hear myself think and I almost start to cry. I can hold it back just in time and I walk to the toilet just in case. I look at myself in the mirror and say, ok, this is it, something has to change, THIS IS NOT LIFE. Someone else telling you what to do, when to do it, when you are allowed to eat and when you are allowed to go home.
If THIS is life, than I do not want it anymore. I feel strong, determined, scared, and all alone. Something has to change!
The beginning of the pivotal moment that I had the guts to quit my perceived safety was that moment. And it started with something I bet you don’t expect; Cold Showers.
Don’t ask me how, because I seriously believe that the whole of this time was divinely guided so it feels like a far away dream that put me in scenes that I had no idea I was going to walk into, and I’m SO glad I did. But one day I find myself on the blog of a man called Joel Runyon. Joel was a big advocate for Cold Showers. Not for health benefits, because yes cold showers also have a lot of health benefits. But for Courage.
Think about it, it makes total sense no? It was the dead of winter, and the first thing in the morning after getting up out of your cozy warm bed, too early for your body, mind and wishes, you have to get into an ice-cold shower.
Eff the health benefits. That is pure torture. So the person that is able to do THAT, to me is a hero. And I needed some of that Heroin Spunk because I wanted to quit my job and only the thought of that send me down a nauseating spiral.
And that’s how it started. But that wasn’t all. During the time of uncovered bravery there was a large media campaign aimed at awareness of and donations for the life threatening lung disease ALS. It was literally everywhere
In the weekend news paper, which that outdated version of me still read, there was a whole article on it that I felt attracted to read. Makes sense to me now, since I felt like a walking dead. The only thing that I remember from reading it was that it hit me right in the heart. And I started playing with the question; What if that was me? What if I only had 6 months to live? Would I really still do a 9-5? Seriously? Of Course Not!! I would quit as fast as Roger Bannister runs!
From that point on it seemed like the Universe was putting ALS posters on all the routes that I was riding my bike into the city or elsewhere. Every single day I would see a humongous poster of someone that had already died from ALS or that was about to die in a couple of months. And every time I felt my heart sink a little bit deeper, my stomach just a little bit tighter and my bravery roar just a little bit harder.
Until the day that I decided to do it! And I did it! I QUIT.
Not fully, but part-time. I did it in increments.
What happened after that? Well First of all I felt FREEEEEE, So FREEEE!! I felt like a bird, like a Kangoroo, like a cow that is allowed out into the field after having been locked up for winter in a stall.
I remember calling one of my best friends at the time elated; TAHIYA! I’m going to the Chamber of Commerce to register as an online media professional because I’ll work part-time from now on!
To which Tahiya answered, hey! You can work at my school we always need people from the field, let me set you up with Rick. And that’s how it happened. I got an amazingly paid freelance Gig, which not only paid me enough to safe up and quit completely once and for all and leave to Australia on a sabbatical which ushered in the next phase of my existence.
From that point I KNEW within my bones that I was taken care of. And that I was worth, that I AM worth exploring another way of living, of being, of doing.
This is about 11 years ago. Since I have been allowing myself to become well-versed in this game called life, magic, synchronicities & TRUST.
If you’d like me to guide you into your own freedom? Then join my program Hello Freedom, Goodbye Fear.
With SO much love,
Victoria-Monique